The Lewis Show

Feminine products are funny! So, is it in you?

Google CEO and co-founders turn down raises - Mar. 31, 2006 However, I don't own 12 billion dollars worth of stock. The dot coms are back and this is an insane, brilliant business model.

The Troops! No, it's not Memorial Day, or Veteran's Day, or Whatever Day, but take a minute and send at least an email to some of our servicemen and women. They freaking deserve it. I'm floored by the amount of sacrifice they face on a daily basis so I can sit here and bitch about my sorry life. Get to it!

"A California man says the RIAA's so-called Clean Slate program is 'hollow and deceptive'." The new age of court battles I think won't be criminal but crap like this. I'm just wondering when someone's going to make a movie or a courtroom drama show on ABC about copyright laws. I just think the system is going to collapse on itself and this is how it's going to happen. I know there are bigger things out there that are putting a strain on things, but let's just redo the copyright laws with common sense in mind..not so much greed. read more  |  digg story

You Are Emerald Green Deep and mysterious, it often seems like no one truly gets you. Inside, you are very emotional and moody - though you don't let it show. People usually have a strong reaction to you... profound love or deep hate. But you can even get those who hate you to come around. There's something naturally harmonious about you. What Color Green Are You?

CNN.com - Report: Sleep 'divorce' counts - Mar 27, 2006 If it were only this easy sometimes. We have enough silly customs over here ourselves..I sure as heck can't judge. TALAQ TALAQ TALAQ! There.

It's time to evolve my thoughts! I'm throwing in pictures...I know, stupid right? I'm still entertaining the masses here. The show must go on, no matter who exits stage left to pursue yet another stupid attempt at being "happy". Tool!!!!! New CD as I mentioned drops next month and the first single finds its way on radio in about 2 weeks. The track is called "Vicarious". I'm getting goosebumps. I have been listening to all of their prior works to get myself ready. I'm also ready for a nice April Fools joke from Maynard. He's getting good at it. The apartment is looking a lot better. I have everything cleaned up and put away. Now I just need..some company. Topaz is grieving. That's what my Mom used to call it anyway when I left my cat and went off to college. She has a grayish tone in her eyes that I haven't seen before and she's gone out of her way to comfort me lately. She's not eating, so I'm getting some fresh food for h

Pepperoni Pizza Robust and dominant. When you go for something, you go full force. You tend to take control of situations easily. And in return, you get a ton of respect. What's Your Pizza Personality?

AskMen.com - Taking Back Yeah, this helped me confirm a lot of my own thoughts, but it's good to see I'm not the first and last to be going through what I'm going through.

I posted just a couple days ago, things and ways to improve my life. To improve my image, to make myself a better person so I can enjoy me and others can enjoy me too. Well there's another kink in this process tonight. I'll be doing this on my own. After knowing Kat for 7 years (as of March 28th), we are going to go our seperate ways. It's not fair to her to blab all of my business on my blog, but now I have to rethink all of my steps again. I have to prove to myself that I do have enough ambition and drive to start over again and to make something out of my life. I'm planning to get my bass and my amp, work on my skills, and start answering ads to join metal bands. I know at my age, that just dosen't sound but so cool, but I'm only 32 by number. I'm not mentally 32. In a lot of ways I'm an old worn out semi retiree, but deep inside there's that 22 year old wanting to come out again. I'd like to "spin records" again on the weeken

You Are Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream A classic and an original, no wonder everyone snakes your style! What Flavor Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream Are You?

I think I've tried to reinvent myself a hundred times in the 32 years of my life now. I've always given in to curisoty, I've seen lots of cool places, met lots of cool people, and have had to said good bye to a lot of cool people. I think at one point I even posted about the changes that I want to make in my life. For me to reach final release version 3, there's a few things I really need to work on first. The weight is always the first to come up. My self image over the past few years has floated over tragic and over the past few months has crept into scary Fuck-it Land. There is no diet that I'm really going to commit myself into outside of cutting out the garbage that I eat and replacing it with better foods. I'm no spring chicken. At my age, what I eat can kill me. Getting up and exercising seems to be the next big hurdle. If I can make myself get up a few minutes early and do my old routine of sit ups and push ups, I would feel a lot better dur

I pulled this from the morning show I listen to here in Richmond. Their link is in the heading. This guy just sounds so much like me. After reading it I felt empowered that he had the balls to forward it to a bunch of people. I felt the tradition should stay alive by doing the same. This is adult content. You've been warned: Brad, It would be difficult for me to be any more miserable right now, I feel like the worst person ever. First, let me start by saying that I am truly truly sorry, and I hate myself for hurting you. Of all the people in the whole entire world, you were honestly the last person that I would ever want to wrong in any way. There is no excuse at all or anything that happened, so I won't even try other than to say all of us had WAY too much to drink, and I did a stupid thing. I can handle you being pissed at me, I absolutely deserve it, I can even handle the ugly words that were exchanged between us, what I can't handle is thinking that you see me as a

.. is boring. But I don't think I've ever had so much fun being bored in my life. I needed the quiet getaway from home. Jessi came in as usual to pick us up from Richmond and took us back Friday night. We stopped over at her house so she could change into her pirate outfit. Oh, yes sir I do have pics. I'm only sharing one though, haha. Want more? Check out her myspace and comment! So she was the only saucy wench at Allen's pirate disco party. It was actually pretty small and lame, but if Allen had a blasty, well then so did we. We mostly sat outside and watched this guy from Brooklyn called Juice freestyle rap. He was amazing. We all went our seperate ways after the "party", and I went back to Appomattox with Jessi. We tried to figure out that new beltway and ended up somewhere in Amhearst so we took the way we knew back home. I got a yummy pretzel out of it though. Saturday we lounged around a bit then headed off to the Jessi family cabin on the James Ri

Thank you, Angelina! Yeah, today is my birthday and I'm 32 now. I don't feel 32 though. I think I still have the mind of a 22 year old. I think I just lost those 10 years somewhere. What's up this weekend? Friday night, Jessi will be coming to pick Kat and me up from Richmond and rushing us back to Lynchburg. Once there, we are going to Allen's birthday party at the skatepark. He's 30 this year. Welcome to old age, buddy! They are having some kind of pirate party. Leave it to Capt. Butt Pirate himself to think something so silly up! Then Saturday night, I believe we are having my party at the inlaws. I think I will have my own bottle of Jagermeister to nurse along with all the shots of drunkeness that Shawn can put together. I'm looking forward to it, I just know tomorrow is going to drag. And Monday I'm going to be a friggen zombie! We still don't have the car back yet, but we should be getting it early next week. I just wanted to give a big public THAN

I just can't mention Ozzfest without mentioning the real Metal tour of the summer. Between this, Ozzfest, Gigantour, and The Unholy Alliance Tour, I'm going to be taking a lot of time away from work. Here's your early lineup so far for Sounds of the Underground: As I Lay Dying In Flames Trivium Cannibal Corpse Terror Black Dahlia Murder Behemoth The Chariot Through The Eyes Of The Dead GWAR

Here we go again, kids. This is what's announced so far. I'm stoked. As much as I said I didn't want to give Sharon another dime for being such a biyatch to Iron Maiden last year, I can drop 30 to support these bands! For more on these bands, check out my MySpace account. I'll rotate the bands on my top 8 so everyone can have some metal/hardcore/post hardcore/death metal goodness. Main Stage: OZZY OSBOURNE SYSTEM OF A DOWN DISTURBED TBA** HATEBREED LACUNA COIL **Major main-stage band to be announced on May 23 Second Stage: BLACK LABEL SOCIETY ATREYU UNEARTH BLEEDING THROUGH NORMA JEAN Second Stage (rotating): A LIFE ONCE LOST STRAPPING YOUNG LAD THE RED CHORD FULL BLOWN CHAOS WALLS OF JERICHO ALL THAT REMAINS BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME

She lay sleeping..at peace (I wonder what she dreams) I try to pull out the pain from her heart ...the damage done to her soul. I realize I'm nothing alone Bad karma has taken it's toll. I'm so helpless, I'm torn apart. I just want to scream to find release. Wife, friend, love (don't be afraid) I will spend my dieing breath.. to see you rise above. I see ahead.. I swim in the past. It's all going so fast (slow down, damn it!) One day this pain will pass, and all the hurt, died dead. Find my hand in the darkened room, Take those painful steps with me. I'd lie or kill or even worse (to see you smile, to end this curse) Your hero in black, not scared death or tomb.. To open that door, and see you run free. (To live again, just to live again) Forever on peaceful shores.

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch: You may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs. The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids. The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking. "Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with

I'm notorious for sharing with people where I find the content for my page, or where I learn about whats going on in tech or anything metal. Now I'm giving out a good starting place to find funny pictures, videos, and flash to use in myspace, etc. This is an adult site, but we 're all grown ups here. Here is where I go. There are several pages of pics and a lot of them have other websites listed on the pic itself. Of course I also go to Google or Yahoo for more. I just make it a point to turn off the filter that way I get the more raw material. Remember though, please..if you want the image, go to a hosting site so you're not stealing bandwidth. It's not cool and you can get someone in $$$ trouble real fast. Enjoy.

Your Porn Star Name Is... Donkey Kong What's Your Porn Star Name? The generator is cool enough but I'm partial to this way to create your porn name. Post yours in my comments! Take the name of your first dog as your first name. Then take the name of the first street you lived on as your last name. So mine you ask? Pee Wee Citation.

Chuck Norris Facts T-shirts What better way to say I love you, than with a Chuck Norris t shirt. Remember, guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills people. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live. Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down. Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush. There is no such thing

mtv.com - News - For Those About To Squawk: Metal Bands With Non-Human Singers Now, I can say I've seen everything. I just wonder if the effin bird is going to have any groupies. Maybe some pigeons will be waiting backstage.

from: blabbermouth.net SLAYER To Team Up With MASTODON, LAMB OF GOD, CHILDREN OF BODOM For U.S. Tour - Mar. 3, 2006 MTV.com is reporting that SLAYER will be teaming up with MASTODON , LAMB OF GOD , CHILDREN OF BODOM and THINE EYES BLEED for two-month U.S. tour beginning on June 6. Dubbed the Unholy Alliance Tour , the trek will make stops in most major cities, although the actual routing of the run is still being fleshed out. "It's been 18 months since we've toured in the States," SLAYER guitarist Kerry King told MTV.com . "People are going to be chomping at the bit to see us again. Our initial thought [with Unholy Alliance ] was to go up against Ozzfest , because I think that tour's getting a little bit tired and I think people are tired of going out and getting sunburned for hours every summer. Every place we play is going to be indoors, with a good-sized lineup.

The Almost Millionaire When Dan found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said as he walked upto her "but in just a week or two, my father will die,and I'll inherit 20 million dollars." Impressed, the woman went home with him that evening and, three days later, she became his stepmother. Women are so much smarter than men.